Revitalization Requires Compassion

Research says that the most important quality that people desire in their leadership is that they care about them as individuals.[1] Dying or plateaued churches are often scarred by leaders who left in frustration. New pastors should not expect the remaining congregants to automatically follow their direction. Leadership is earned, not demanded. One of the fastest ways to generate loyalty is to demonstrate compassion towards members (sometimes few) of the congregation. One of the fastest ways to lose respect is to demand submission to leadership.

John Chapter 13

34 A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.

35 By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.

We are in the people business; therefore, intent and personal motive is often irrelevant. Perception is a very real issue for leaders. We must manage the reality of our followers’ perceptions. It may not be a reality to you, but it is a reality to them. Leaders should decide how they want others to view them and act accordingly. For example, you may have a legitimate reason for not showing interest in being disengaged during a service, but we are called to live as “epistles read of men.”[2] Ineffective religious leaders traditionally choose the posture of inerrancy and cynicism when falsely accused of wrong motives. Depending on a leader’s personality, they may feel offended that someone assigned wrong motives. Regardless of how surprised you are by someone’s unfair assertions, respond in a compassionate Christian manner.

On December 20th, 1942, American B-17 bomber pilot Charlie Brown’s plane was severely damaged in a firefight with German planes. Only one of his four engines continued to run making his plane an easy target for German fighters. Brown’s squadron had lost contact with him and assumed he was shot down by the enemy fire. Brown and his gunner had passed out behind the yoke, yet the plane continue to fly level. German Luftwaffe pilot Franz Stigler flew to intercept the plane with intention of shooting it down. Right before Stigler pulled the trigger, he noticed Brown’s desperate condition and had compassion for his enemy. He flew in a tight formation with the damaged plane until Brown regained consciousness. Charlie was startled when he awoke and saw the enemy’s plane behind him. He expected the German pilot to shoot him out of the sky. To his surprise, Stigler gave Brown a salute and retreated back to German territory. Many years after the war Brown and Stigler were reunited. Stigler had migrated to Canada. The elderly Brown and Stigler remained best friends until both men died in 2008.

Stigler’s momentary act of compassion is a reminder for ministers to demonstrate kindness even when justified to “pull the trigger.” You will meet resistance when you begin the process of revitalization. Leaders should avoid the temptation to "pull the trigger" on difficult members unless they are affecting the progress of the congregation. There are times when members need to leave to facilitate health and growth in the congregation. If a particularly toxic member needs to go, try to send them off with kindness...but make sure they are gone. Ex-members who are angry at leadership can create additional drama and tension with the remaining congregation. If you are forced to ask a"troublemaker" to leave, do not feel compelled to lay all your frustrations on them as they walk out the door. Remember, compassion is the currency that purchases loyalty.

[1] John Hall. 11 Simple Ways To Show Your Employees You Care. Forbes Magazine. https://www.forbes.com/sites/johnhall/2014/03/10/11-simple-ways-to-show-your-employees-you-care/?sh=5ee30bb8450e March 10,2014 [2] 2 Cor 3:2